Heterosexual Men & Transsexuals

Fragment from a usenet conversation about the way some heterosexual men feel a need to prove that they aren’t attracted to MTF people:

Morgane:

That reminds me. Sometimes I’ll be at a party and a guy will be talking, flirting, and so on. In some awkward way, he’ll eventually ask if I was born a female (it’s perfectly obvious I was not). After that, these guys will give me 10 minutes of why they could never accept a transsexual domme, how they aren’t gay, and blubblah. Unless I prevent them by literally walking away, or devouring their soul as they watch helplessly. …

A followup, the italized words are mine:

richardevans…@….com wrote:

There are all too many men who are confused by their buried feelings about a penis. Especially if they feel a need to expound on their lack of interest at length.

I’m having a hard time posting, but:

If it were simple lack of interest. What’s going on here is that I’ve dared say aloud that I’m transgendered. Somehow these guys who were flirting with me knowing what I am, now feel justified in telling me I’m unsuitable for them, and furthermore that I’m at all interested in the various psychological twists that compel them to the depths of rudeness.

Now that I’ve thought about it, (probably for the first time) The hitch might be that I had a perfectly grabbable ass 30 seconds ago when there was faint hope that I just had a deep voice and was otherwise ‘safe’. But now that optomism is dead, there’s a taste of sour grapes as they try and process how they feel about me.

It’s not all bad though, some men are able to process their first meeting with a woman they know is transgendered without insulting me, and staying attractive as we talk it over. It’s often a good day for both of us when they do : )

I have to walk a very different path. I’m most strongly drawn to people of atypical gender identity. Not a tranny chaser (indeed a transsexual would be last on my “list” if I were to have one). So I have to be scrupulously sure that I don’t even seem to be objectifying transgendered persons. I like seeing old conventions and definitions flouted, mocked, destroyed.

We, and especially you, are on a narrow path trying to convince gender variant people of our sincerity. There’s a lot of trauma out there.

Not that I’m immune to the beauty of normal people. But they aren’t as aesthetically interesting.

There’s something about the way the mind shapes the body.

Morgane

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