It isn't easy being ambiguously, differently, dangerously gendered
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An Live Journal exchange with an ambiguously, differently, dangerously gendered friend.
From the other side (in a sense).
The first day I met Charles we went to look at a software package that he was interested in. When he found it he thrust his credit card at me and said to go wait in line and pay for it. I was very turned on. Iím very drawn to innocence and vulnerability but Iíve always liked a streak of bossiness.
It is hard to say whether Iím socially passive or just very anti-social. But sexually I like to take the lead. Not that I want someone as passive as a plastic doll. My pleasure is in setting the pace and doing most of the doing. I didnít realize this until I slept with someone with the same bias and wasnít sure how to react.
my life..someone who is dominating me in the bedroom, someone who wants me to be submissive
My impression is that this is fairly true of most gay men (not that Iím trying to type you, simply my area of experience). Iíve always wondered why. Again without typing you, it seemed especially true of the crossdresser that I met online, usually extending into masochism. I donít disapprove of any sort of sex play. But having seen my father knock my motherís teeth out when I was a little kid makes me squirm at the idea that femininity implies being a punching bag.
not use me to quench some kinky fetish he might possess about "girls" like myself
Possibly the biggest problem facing ďgirls like yourself.Ē Most people are still trapped by conventional perceptions of gender. Which seems to leave ambiguously self-defined people as illicit, cheap thrills.
I have never kissed (passionately) any of my lovers
Ouch. A deep, loving kiss is as good as any other part of sex.
nor has any of my lovers fully seen me naked (except one)
I wish my friend cd332 hadnít removed his ďMan of Two WorldsĒ page from his website. I donít really have a right to an opinion but Iíve always felt that to the degree it is possible people should be able to share and enjoy their genetic, psychological and social gender.