Male Housewife

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In my blundering way I suspect I may have come across as harsh in an exchange with one of the very few people in the world I really value (Collect the set now. Bonus characters available only with Happy Meals.)

The theme was having one partner / spouse stay at home and make the home more comfortable and, well, homey.

I was speaking against doing that. My main fear was making the person who stays at home less able. That certain social skills and even the capacity to tolerate working for others can easily atrophy.

Recalling this exchange I remembered when Charles and I first took possession of this house.

Charles earned about $700 a month for six hours work. Originally we had planned for him to stay home otherwise. He had all sorts of home prefification projects in mind. And I was all for that. Coming home to a pretty boy who had been doing graceful and appealing things seemed like the best imaginable conclusion to work I could imagine.

And - at the time - I didn’t want him to feel any stress at all.

Really I’m sure given the right guy a male housewife would be awful nice.


I had a sort of housewife for seven years, until just recently: a dear friend lived with me, I paid him an allowance, and he took care of the house and was able to work on his lifelong writing project. It was really awesome having someone take care of things in that way.

Ultimately, though, I’d rather have a larger joint income than the luxury of a stay-at-home partner. Kids might change that picture, but in that case I’d definitely rather be the working partner than the house spouse.

Children … no way I’d want to be a stay-at-home mom.

I’ve always thought a female housewife would be rather nice. Despite all the stuff about femdom I am not convinced that a male at home would suit me but that just might be because of the difficulty I have had supervising the men in my life.

Probably the big question is do you want to live with someone who is also your lover. I’ve always thought Yes.

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Pansexual Sodomite
Ambiguously Gendered
Male Housewife
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