Erotic Orientation Labels
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I used to blog frequently about erotic orientation labels. There wasn’t much about pansexuality on the web back then and I enjoyed teasing out what it meant to be. And I find playing with sexual labels entertaining.
Naturally I heard often from people who didn’t ‘believe’ in labels, meaning that they didn’t feel that any label could describe them. In a world of billions of people no one has qualities that are really that rare. But they may not have met their sexual kith and kin. Something the web is doing a good job of putting an end to.
A label is just a noun. And like most nouns are meaningless shorn of details and nuances. You may be looking for a house. But likely not any house. Perhaps a brick house. A brick two-story house. A brick two-story house, with large front and backyards, in a safe neighborhood that costs less than so many dollars.
Similarly you may be, say, a gay male bottom. But open to bottoming in certain acts. You might always want to role-play being a bottom - being called dirty names - or find that intolerable. A bottom that prefers anonymous sex or will sleep only with men you’ve had a chance to get to know.
An erotic orientation label is only a beginning: it is meaningless without qualifications.
People often use labels to assert who they aren’t. To stay with our current example a bottom or top may quickly assert a label when asked to engage in the role they don’t enjoy.
Labels are bad only when they are used without care.