The Bi in Bisexual
» Love and Lust
Until recently it never occurred to me that some might picture bisexuality as a narrow form of sexual and affectional orientation.
I’ve known bisexuals who like females who match fairly closely some sort of gender norm at least in the superficies and hetero-conventional males. They are attracted to both genders when they are normative.
And those more broadly erotic.
There are bisexuals who can have sex with either gender but love and form partnerships with only one. Many gay men can have sex with a woman. Pleasure in the resultant orgasm varies considerably. But they’d never want to marry one.
Erotic orientation doesn’t mean there’s symmetry of lust and romantic feelings. Even pansexual people may discover blank spots in their sexual spectrum.
And it isn’t only bodies and gender qualities that determine sexual attractiveness - except in the shallow - but persona, intelligence: any attribute that is a part of a person’s way of interacting with and perceiving the external world.
Sexual labels are guideposts - necessary for conservation - not continua. Without the nuances, subtleties and shadings labels are sometimes nothing more than dead nouns.
