Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind*

The discovery of my own variegated sexuality has made me often wonder what expansiveness lies latent in others.

If I were a disinterested, uncompassionate alien being wanting to experiment with people I'd grab them up in pairs. And distributed them variously according to a plan: isolate a straight woman with a gay man or a lesbian and similarly with men. And see what happened. Probably nothing without a cosmic horniness ray.

The transitory homosexuality acquired by (possibly) heterosexual men in prison, the military and private schools put this in my mind. I've wondered the degree the desire for sex with another person can at least transitorily abolish sexual orientation.

Flaws in the idea come readily to mind. Maybe the men are repressed bisexuals. Men who get put in prison are unable to control their appetites.

Men in prison are also people who have, admittedly trivially, shabbily, pushed outside a social norm. Hasbians, the temporary lesbians, aren't under any compulsion, are often in sustained relationships.

Sexuality is a quirky mess. Literarily sometimes: I remember one straight male hustler from back when I was selling boys in Atlanta. More a hustler manquι. Once while a man was going down him he was so revolted he threw up. The boy was so embarrassed. I hope he learned how to use a hammer or a wrench or something. To be fair from the couple of times I sold myself I don't think you needed a conflicting sexual orientation to make you vomit.

Same sex prostitution is another datum. But when I was running Youngman, Inc. I wouldn't hire guys who thought they were straight (the fellow above worked for my colleague at Party Boys).

Aliens will probably stick to anal probing, mutilating cattle and making crop circles. (I doubt they'd bother with the first two. Making crop circles to baffle the yokels is good fun for man and extraterrestrials both.)

See also: Pansexual masturbation fantasies and choosing your sexuality

* Can't beat the Old Testament.