18 Months ...
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The last eighteen months have been so draining and demanding. Not that it has all been bad. There’s having my old friend Sendy become Alex my beloved.
But about a year and a half ago I wrote an entry about how Charles - my then lover - didn’t read or comment on my site.
My feelings for him began to die that day. That he wouldn’t read or comment on what I had to say cut me deeply. I’m a verbal man and I need words in response. I felt unloved.
Not that he didn’t love me. But he didn’t in a way that meant enough for me. The day I crystallized those thoughts in words was the day I was ready to leave him.
Not knowing he’d become a crack addict, that I’d have Sendy/Alex in my life. That Charles would die.
I hope my next eighteen months are more serene, pacific, quiet, fulfilling.