One of the saddest nights of my life
» My Life is an Open Blog
(A couple of weeks ago … )
I had my arms around him as we sat that night on the porch swing.
Lucidly, hopelessly he confessed that in a few minutes he would walk around the corner for more crack cocaine. I told him that my only choice would be to leave and spend the night in a motel.
Though helpless before his addiction he understood. We kissed and I went to call my best friend who would take me away from my own home and the guy who'd been my lover for almost four years.
Comments
Richard just read this.
I am so sorry -that is so painful. I am almost in tears, you must be in such pain.
It makes me appreciate what I do have.
I have a new computer. If you want to talk Email me maybe I can help. I cannot respond right away I leave for work at 6:45am and get in after 7:30pm but will check if there is a note. Right now I am at work.
Again -I really feel for you and have been worried about you because you were not posting.
I also feel for him because he appears to be terminal and from my life with a terminal patient I understand how difficult it is. He must be so tired not to fight for you and his life.
You have my best wishes and prayers
Posted by: AlexFinn | November 4, 2004 9:52 AM
I can’t imagine what you are going through but at least you have the good times to reflect upon as you move on. They will both sadden and uplift you.
Warm and compassionate wishes.
Mitch
Posted by: MitchMission | November 4, 2004 10:57 PM
Know that you are in my thoughts. I think of you daily and wish only the best for you.
Posted by: magdala | November 5, 2004 1:21 AM
Alex,
Thanks, I’m not much up to talking right now. Even posting short notes here takes almost what emotional energy I have right now. But your kindness is deeply appreciated.
Mitch and magdala,
My warmest thanks.
Posted by: Richard Evans Lee | November 5, 2004 6:49 AM
Not much one can say to you to make things better, but know that your’e not the only one out there. Hugs to you and hoping clarity and peace comes your way soon.
Posted by: epicurist | November 15, 2004 9:40 AM
I too am i love with a man who is a crack addict and it is very difficult. As much as I love him is as much as I hate his addiction. It is very sad and I have learned that there is nothing you can do to stop it except save yourself.
I don’t care if you are black, white, hispanic, gay or straight, man or woman, crack can affect your life when someone you love is an addict.
I personally have never smoked crack nor do i ever want to… i have seen first hand how much destruction it can do not only to the addict but to those who love him
I have no advice except think about yourself- you cannot help a crack addict
Posted by: theresa | December 1, 2004 5:08 AM
crack addiction is very common.its so sad that u can sit with your lover and he or she can tel u soberly im about to ger cracked.the only way to overcome this is 2 take the person from the enviroment where they cant get any resources for crack..they have 2 ,make new friends ect.. props 2 u for your support.
Posted by: tamara | September 26, 2005 2:39 AM