Being gay in a small town

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Often I suspect gay people who've grown up in more cosmopolitan countries, urban areas or were just lucky can forget how different it is for gay men and women who grow up in America's small towns. Little communities where there's less privacy, vastly more smugness and nonconformity carries a greater penalty.

Gay men in cities pat themselves on the back because they listen to a minor band and pretend they are new Rimbauds. Less lucky queers may be more likely to be condemned, beaten, even murdered if they want to let their sexuality express itself. Even now in a wealthy country that preens itself on too many things to list.

The article has many quotes from the land of Bible-thumpers. Homophobia can take a more vicious turn in the thousands of forgotten crossroads where the New York Times hasn't been heard of much less read. There are enough of them to elect a beady-eyed halfwit president and make a gay person's self-discovery, self-exploration, self-expression a fearful series of hurts.

Gay and lesbian teens in rural areas are more likely to be in the closet than their urban counterparts. And they may be lacking the resources to help them come out. ...

Since rural teens are less likely to disclose their homosexuality, they are less likely to encounter positive gay role models, Kutrona said.

Growing up gay in a small town


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» Growing Up Gay from Mizzou Guy
Our childhood and teenage years are supposed to be carefree and stress-free times in our lives. When we can just enjoy the fact that we are a kid and hang out with friends without the worries of a job, paying... [Read More]


I propose we revise the Gay Agenda and promote a “back to the country” policy so that young teens in small town and rural America can have positive role models. We can start small as night clerks at the mini marts. Then as more gays flock back to their roots we can buy up the motels, diners, taverns. In the last wave, we can become pastors of “liberal” denominations where you don’t have to believe, but just deliver a good message. It worked for the sub-continentals, it could work for the gays, too. Except, for those who have to go to Starbucks everyday, or J Crew, or Pottery Barn. No, it probably wouldn’t work, we couldn’t get enough votes at the next convention to meet the two-thirds margin to change the Agenda.

I was there in the 1960s. Today’s small town and rural gay teen may have to face the battle of place; but at least time has been on their side as concerns the American society. When at the age of 14 I told one of my best friends of my attraction to another male classmate, I got back one of the most homophobic speeches I have ever heard. Well, I shut-up about it. As the article stated:

“Either way, you can forget about finding any support or understanding. Your best shot of survival is to remain in the closet … way in the closet.”

Sometimes the closet is your own mind. You try to be what is expected of you and to suppress your feelings. No gay, no person, should have to go through that.

Hi my name is josh i live in Logansport Indiana and i am 16 years old and i i knew i was gay sence i was 5 i got made fun of and had no friends unti i got to High School and i still get made fun of someone times but not as much and i have alot of friends and some of them are gay

I live in Logansport, Indiana and I hate when homosexual people get made fun of. Some of my best friends are gay and I tell people not to say anything about gay people when I am around. I’ve gotten into trouble quite a few times for ‘instigating a fight’ with someone made fun of my friends. Everyone thinks you can pick gay people out because they dress like ‘fags’ (don’t they call cigarettes fags? I don’t know about you but the gay people I’ve seen don’t look like cigarettes) They don’t understand that it doesn’t matter how they dress the only difference is the like people of the same gender. You know sometimes I am really surprised at the level of stupidity some people have. Anyway I just wanted to say that not all people discrimminate someone for their sexual orientation.

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